Personal Growth Planet Blog

I recently read about one woman’s challenge to not look at herself in a mirror for a full year. Kjerstin Gruys, a sociologist, wants women to re-think body image and to question portrayals of women’s beauty in the media.

What made this challenge even more daunting is that Gruys planned and prepared for her own wedding during this year of no mirrors. Gruys and her fiance were married recently, by the way.

While I applaud the statement that Gruys is making with her year of no mirrors, I have to wonder…

Is the mirror really the problem after all?

What does accepting– even loving– your body have to do with what really matters in life? Why is feeling beautiful important anyway?

After all, wars are being waged, people are losing their jobs, people are starving and suffering, the Earth is changing in many worrisome and scary ways…

Aren’t those the really important things?

When I get all caught up in feeling less than lovely, I start to feel embarrassed. It seems somewhat narcissistic and self-obsessed for me to be stressing out and consumed by my negative perceptions of how I think my body looks.

I’m learning to appreciate the curves
…of my body.

The lumps, the bumps, the peaks, valleys
and the rough places too.

This curvy, shapely, not-thin body of mine
is rounded and full of past, present and future.

It speaks of pain, joy, shame, ecstasy, birth and life.

It tells tales of first touches– some rough and painful, others tender and sweet.

The word “unconditional” is thrown around quite a bit. It is often assumed that parents love their children unconditionally. Lovers are expected to love one another unconditionally. To boost self esteem, a person is encouraged to accept him or herself unconditionally.

I don’t know about you, but truly accepting or even loving unconditionally is not as easy as it sounds.

If any of us are completely honest with ourselves, we’d probably discover that there’s not a whole lot of unconditional loving or accepting going on.

It often catches me off-guard when I come upon some evidence of my aging body.

I look down to see my already-wrinkled hands, speckled with a few brown spots. I glance in the mirror to find stubborn gray hairs that seem to be ignoring the fact that I just dyed my hair brown.

I am rarely pleased with these new discoveries.

I hear friends, who are around my age (I’m 41), talk about how their bodies are becoming stiffer, less agile and their minds more scattered and forgetful.

By Amy Phillips-Gary

The organization People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) is notorious for making their message known in an in-your-face and difficult to forget way.

I’m usually all in favor of guerilla theater, nonviolent resistance and other forms of getting the word out about particular causes in creative and colorful ways.

But I’m never in favor of shaming and degradation.

Recently, PETA put up a new billboard in Florida with the words “Save the Whales” in bright pink letters.*

By Amy Phillips-Gary

Are you a dieter?

You might be on, or have tried, the Atkins or South Beach diets or perhaps The Zone, Weight Watchers or Jenny Craig programs. There seem to be a plethora of choices when it comes to diet plans.

Not everyone is on a weight-loss diet, though many of us are.

According to a CBS news story, around 45 million Americans diet each year. About $1-$2 billion is spent on weight-loss programs annually in the U.S.

Those numbers indicate that a lot of people are dissatisfied with their bodies!