Dance Your Own Dance
Drums beat a steady, almost hypnotic rhythm. Bodies move, twist, turn and twirl and intermingle with and among the beats.
Dancing…
In some form or another I have danced throughout my life. As a young girl, I took tap and jazz dance lessons. I can still remember kick ball changing my way across the wooden floors of Miss Lois’ dance studio.
Many bright points for me in the midst of my angst-filled high school years were singing and dancing in the show choir. And, for the past few years, I have taken belly dancing classes at a local recreation center. I am filled with gratitude for the patient and good-humored belly dancing teachers I have who, yet again, try to help me learn to undulate and shimmy.
While I have danced over the course of my life so far, I do not consider myself to be a dancer.
I very much appreciate the way that some people seem to so easily, gracefully and sensually abandon themselves to the music, the rhythms and the intuition of their bodies as they move in beautiful and emotive ways.
This is not something I have opened up to within myself (yet). I tend to focus intently on making the right moves in the right way and on the right count. I can usually approximate the choreography (in my own manner), but the symbiosis with the music and the choreography that I admire in the movements of other dancers is missing for me.
To Be a Dancer…
The different ways that each of us moves through life is similar to this distinction I am making between one who dances and the dancer.
The one who dances usually moves through life paying close attention to what is expected of him or her and also to what is “right” or “wrong.” These types of people know the rules and know what they value– this sometimes includes being “right,” making others happy or winning approval and sometimes involves knowingly breaking those rules and risking disapproval.
This is not to say that the person who dances does not experience happiness or does not offer the world gifts that are new, different and beautiful. A lot can be accomplished by those who dance, even innovation and invention. Yet, the dance/movement through life often occurs within certain boundaries and the passion that drives the dance/movement is generally kept somewhat reined in and more controlled.
Then, there are the dancers…
These are people who appear to intuitively glide through their days. From my outsider’s perspective, dancers seem to give themselves wholly over to the experience. They have goals and aspirations, but they don’t get thrown off when the unexpected happens or when they face obstacles. They move with the music and the rhythms that are present while maintaining their uniqueness and direction.
Their cooperation with life– including all of its surprises– can make for a beautiful, seamless and joyful experience.
In reality, there aren’t always these clear and dichotomous distinctions between approaches to life. Many of us experience times when we are more controlled, rule-following and approval-seeking and other times when we surrender to the rhythms of the moment and we intuitively glide along.
There is much to learn from both the one who dances and the dancer. Both approaches can teach us and help us to expand and grow.
My encouragement is for each of us to recognize how we tend to move through life. Acknowledge the times when our habitual ways serve us and allow us to grow and when our habits mostly hold us back and keep us stifled and dissatisfied.
Cultivate confidence in your own dance…
I recognize that when I yearn to be more like the dancer, there rises up within me a certain fear and also a self-consciousness.
To give myself over to a moment and blend with the rhythms of a situation can feel like I will be terrifyingly out of control. I also notice my worries about whether or not others will like my choices and me if I dare to dance my own dance. What if I am laughed at, ignored or rejected?
Pay attention to the fears and worries that prevent you from moving through your life in ways that serve you the most. When you feel called to express yourself in a particular manner, what warning sirens blast in your mind and hold you in your usual mode?
It is necessary to nurture trust when it comes to dancing your own dance. Be patient with your hesitations and your fears as you stay tuned in to that inner call that helps you know your own dance. Gently, bring your awareness to what you CAN trust about yourself and your life.
Remind yourself of where you are right now and really hear what your inner self is urging you to do. Make sure to also remind yourself of whose opinion of you and your unique dance matters the most…that’s your own.
Invite yourself to take even one step that is in line with your own dance and then another and another until you are no longer thinking as much as you are being and dancing. Feel what this kind of freedom is like.
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*Photo by Mr. eNil.
