Can’t Buy Me Love…
The Beatles sang it so memorably– “Money can’t buy me love.” It is possible that every one of us has had a moment in which we realized that money and material possessions cannot bring us the love and happiness for which we may have been longing.
Perhaps it was when you saved and saved for a newer model car or a larger home and, once that goal was reached, you felt a twinge of disappointment. The angst or the unhappiness that you felt before was still there– even if you were pleased with the purchase (however big or small).
There are no two ways about it that a fancy car, a house in a nicer neighborhood or pricey bling hanging around your neck are absolutely not the secret to a fulfilling and joyous life.
But, still, there are many of us– myself included– who find ourselves yearning for the comforts and luxury that money and things can bring. To be honest, there are positive aspects to the comforts that money can bring. It is most definitely a plus to be able to take regular vacations, treat yourself occasionally and not worry all of the time about what you can afford and how you will pay your bills.
At the same time and on some level, many of us– myself included– carry around beliefs that wealth is synonymous with corruption, greed and selfishness.
And we wonder why we struggle financially and why we can’t seem to attain the level of joy we’d like in life!
Money can’t buy me love… but it’s not the root of “evil” either.
It’s not the material possessions that cause us turmoil It’s not even our aspirations for a more luxurious life (whatever that means to each of us).
What can turn us into a mess of stress and keep us stuck feeling poor and unhappy are these conflicting beliefs about money and financial abundance– and also about having things.
Perhaps it’s time for those of us who weigh ourselves down not so much with material possessions but with the internal clashing of beliefs about money to try something different.
Let’s face it– we live in societies that rely on the exchange of money for goods and services. We don’t necessarily “need” everything that we buy for our survival, but we do thrive partly due to the goods and services that we purchase with money.
No, money cannot buy any of us happiness or a sense of fulfillment, but it can provide the foundation and freedom from which we can create the kind of happy, joyous and fulfilled lives we crave.
It’s really difficult to focus in on things like personal growth, improving your relationships with loved ones and following your bliss when you’re merely trying to put food on the table and a roof over your head.
Money is necessary and money can be the means by which you live the kind of life you truly desire.
It’s nearly impossible to attract the kind of money to support the kind of life you desire when you believe that money is bad.
It’s not a huge surprise that many, many of us walk around hefting these conflicting beliefs about money and material possessions. Discordant messages about money and wealth seem to be everywhere around us. Plenty of us judge those who seem to be living on “Easy Street” even as we secretly wish we had a private home on a tropical island somewhere.
There’s got to be (and there is) a way to create the kind of financial abundance for ourselves that we want and do so in ways that are in alignment with our personal values and ethics.
It all starts with shifting our approach to and beliefs about money.
Catch yourself if you begin to pin your happiness, self worth or self esteem on a material object or some external symbol.
Catch yourself when you start to think that wanting more for yourself (including material possessions or money) is somehow bad, greedy or that it will corrupt you.
Watch your thoughts and question the ones that are absolute and critical.
Begin to look around yourself and cultivate more appreciation for what you’ve got and for the direction you are pointed. This may actually be the key to resolving the internal struggle that’s going on within you and that keeps you stuck and unhappy.
You see, appreciation– that is genuine and not a self-induced guilt trip– will help you feel happier and more fulfilled right where you are. Appreciation will also put you in an energetic place to attract more of what you DO want into your life.
From a place of appreciation for what you have and less negativity about money and wealth, you can more easily see the opportunities you couldn’t see before and you feel the inspiration that seemed absent before. Appreciation is a great way to resolve your inner battles and open up to the many forms of abundance that are there for you.
*For more tips about how to cultivate appreciation in your life, click here to read “Appreciation Tips– Even When It’s Hard to Do.”
Comment from Spiritualitynow
Time December 1, 2010 at 4:01 am
A good post. I agree, watching your thoughts on material things is important. we must always remember that money should be our slave, not our master.