The Hazards of Time Travel
I’m 1 week ahead as my visiting father departs my home and my mother-in-law arrives for a visit. I bid farewell and welcome this flurry of guests.
Now, I’m 24 years in the past, with friends at a high school show choir performance. We are singing, dancing and having a great time together.
Next, I am a year from now at the beach with my husband and sons. The ocean swells and we play together in the surf and the sand.
All of that time travel happened for me in the span of about 15 minutes (more or less).
Just about every one of us time travels just like this. Our minds wander ahead to events that have not happened yet (and may never ever happen) or they take us back to the past to memories of experiences that may have been delightful, horrifying or something in between.
I’ve written before about the importance of living in the present moment and I’m going to do so again today. This slight repeat is because being present to your life RIGHT NOW is absolutely key to creating the kind of experience that you actually want…instead of reacting to what seems to be thrown your way.
Any one of us time travels for various reasons– they aren’t necessarily bad or good.
Sometimes you are bored and so you think back to the excitement and adventure you had with friends a month ago (or maybe even years ago).
Other times you are reaching for an escape from the emotional pain of what’s currently occurring. You might journey in your mind to an imagined scene which is soothing and comforting.
And, you may intentionally dream of a different future for yourself and your loved ones– a future of abundance, peace, health and happiness.
Envisioning your future can be a powerful thing to do. Problems can arise, however, when you fixate on your imagined future and don’t come back to what’s going on right now.
When you time travel here’s what often happens…
You miss out on the precious moments.
When you focus most of your attention on the past or the future, you absolutely miss out on the wonderful moments that are happening right now.
In the blink of an eye, the most gorgeous butterfly lands on a flower just outside your window. Your child looks at you with a depth of love that you’ve never seen before. Your partner reaches out to connect with you about a disagreement.
What’s happening in this moment might not always be pleasant or preferable, but there are precious aspects that you will miss if you are time traveling.
You miss out on opportunities you may have been waiting for.
Remember those dreams that you have to travel the world, start your own business, find your perfect mate, or whatever they are? When you aren’t present in each moment, you can’t see and follow up on the opportunities that are available to you and that can move you closer to your dreams.
Yes, by all means, create a vision for the future that you desire (and have fun doing it). But, then bring yourself back to the present moment.
Live with presence and fully in the now and you will be amazed at how the offers, invitations and “coincidences” line up to take you where you truly want to go.
You react inappropriately to a current situation.
When you are time traveling and a difficult situation comes up, it’s almost impossible to choose a response that will be the most effective for resolving the situation. You might find yourself saying and doing things that are a match for what happened in your past, but really have little to do with what is going on right now.
For example, let’s say that your partner doesn’t call to let you know that he or she will be late coming home from work. If you have had a past experience in which someone you loved didn’t call and then you discovered that your mate was cheating or doing something else that was upsetting to you, it may be tempting to go back to the past and react to your current partner from there.
You can probably guess how a scenario like this will turn out. Quite a bit of jealousy is due to one (or both) people simply not living in the present moment. And, in turn, quite a few arguments and even break ups result.
You exponentially add to your angst and pain.
The problem with allowing your mind to take you back to the past or into an imagined future is that you can heap onto yourself far more emotional turmoil than you might otherwise feel.
Many of us play the “What if?”game. We look at the conditions of our body, our relationship, our career, our child, etc. and we (usually fearfully) wonder “What if…”
“What if I get sick and I can’t work anymore?”
“What if my child flunks out of school and can’t get a job to support himself?”
“What if my wife finds another man who is more successful than me and she leaves me?”
In any situation, about a billion “What if?” statements can flip through our minds. This is a high speed sort of time travel and it will ONLY add to the angst and pain that you might already be feeling.
Of course, you can play the “What if?” game in more positive and beneficial ways, but most of us generally don’t.
If you want to avoid these hazards of time travel, perhaps it’s time to set a challenge for yourself. Every day and even when the going gets tough, deliberately choose to be present more of the time.
Look for those precious gems of love, connection and opportunity that are there in even the most difficult of moments and watch how your life can positively transform.
