Personal Growth Planet Blog

“Everyone, please send me texts and, Dad, could you bring my bike?”

This request was posted on a social networking site by the daughter of a friend of mine who recently started college. As you might already know, moving away from home, family and friends to embark upon what is essentially a brand new life can be unsettling, uncomfortable and maybe even a bit terrifying.

Of course, going to college (or setting out on another kind of new adventure) is also potentially exhilarating and exciting…especially if you feel like you are being supported along the way.

Just about everyone I know is overcommitted and has a difficult time saying “no.”

It seems to be the American way to agree to whatever request (or demand) is thrown our way– and then complain about, resent and feel powerless to whatever it is we felt compelled to say “yes” to in the first place.

It all comes down to a desire, perhaps even a desperate need, to please.

Even the most non-conforming individuals among us want to be liked. While there are those who may not comfortably admit it, just about everyone has a need to feel loved and accepted (even if it’s on our terms, in specific sub-cultures and in our own unique ways).

Peace means something different to us all.

It might mean a quiet morning with a cup of tea, a good book and nothing else but the sounds of birds singing and the rustling of wind in the trees.

Instead, peace might be the adrenaline rush that comes with biking on a mountain path, sweat dripping, heart and other muscles pumping and the wind in your face.

Peace may just be the absence of bickering, fighting or angst. It could be the realization that the kids, you and your partner or others in your home, community and world have ceased their usual wars for awhile.

To be called “selfish,” is rarely a compliment.

In the dictionary, the word is defined as: self-serving, self-interested, stingy, egotistical and more. None of these descriptions have any morsel of positive connotation either.

I grew up an only child and I totally cringe when I hear another person drag out that tired stereotype of the spoiled and selfish only child.

But, what if being selfish wasn’t such a detestable and shame-worthy thing after all?

What if being selfish was actually just the way that we all are– when we really admit it? And what if owning our own selfish-nesses helped make this world a better place?